Strahd of Various



  • He is a buffoonish harlequin
    With a nasty habit of getting
    The shit - the shit kicked out of him
  • Wil catches the coin tossed to him. Examines it for a split second and places it in a pouch.

    “Since we can’t go back, let’s go forward.”

    He then continues along the path.
  • Toll the bell!
    We're going to Hell!
    Here we seek the fruit of creation
    Bloodstained wine
    It sweetens our time
    Here we seek the final salvation
    (We're gonna go to Hell!)
    From what I've heard, it's a pretty cool place
    A sea of urine where rats eat your face
    A sadist like me can pursue his vocation
    I'm going to Hell because I need a vacation
  • Wil thinks this is a strange bard, but he smiles at him regardless. But he thinks to himself that he would not be good for diplomatic situations or stealth.
  • SockSock RabbleRouser
    The group hears a howl in the distance. You all continue down the path as the mist seems to be closing in once again.
  • SockSock RabbleRouser
    As you proceed down the path you begin to see shapes in thee mist once again. Wil you notice the shapes are wolves as one comes close, snapping at you.

    You see 3 large wolves.

    *Roll Initiative*
  • Who's knocking on my door?
    Come the carnivore
    Now he eats your skin
    You can't win
  • SockSock RabbleRouser
    Wil, seeing the danger coming, readies his grassroots and decapitates the first wolf he sees.

    The other two wolves attack Wil as he tries to dodge out of the way but one wolf catches him in the leg and deals 6 dmg to wil.
  • SockSock RabbleRouser
    Seeing his party mate in trouble, Fully Torqued runs headfirst at the closest wolf but misjudged the distance and starts headbanging violently a full 3 feet from his target.
  • Your pock marked face makes her sick
    As soon as she's in there she's getting the dick
    But not from you, from the entire band
    So whip out your cock and lay a wad in your hand
  • SockSock RabbleRouser
    As Oderus Urungus finishes his speech, he moves to action and introduces the nearest wold to Unt Lick. Gashing it deeply as Oderus closes in to make sex to the corpse that isn't dead yet.
  • Animal
    Didn't have to say please
    I'm fuckin' an animal
    With Legionnaires' disease
    I'm fucking an animal
    Damn hard on the knees!
    I'm fucking an animal

    Animal fucker on the loose
    Fuckin' an animal
    I'll go from dog to goose
    Fuckin' an animal
    One time I fucked a moose
    Fuckin' an animal

    Now the animal's in pain
    It's in pain, it's in pain, it's in pain, terrible pain
    But now it starts to rain
    But I'm still the same...
  • SockSock RabbleRouser
    Prihani leaps into action, finishing off the remaining two wolves.

    As the dust settles, you hear more howls from the mist as you notice at least a dozen more shapes in the mist.
  • I can tell they fear us
    I can tell they fear us
    By the way they fire
    By the way they fire
    We infiltrate
    We wade through hip-deep filth
    And then we come at them
    From below
  • SockSock RabbleRouser
    Wil, recognizing the dire situation, yells "Run!" As he beats cheeks down the path. The rest of the group, eyes wide in fear, follow close behind. The wolves follow, though never leaving the mist, as it belches forth and a thick fog envelopes the path behind you as you run.

    You run down the path through the forest, nearly an hour passes before the trees start to thin and you can see the edge of the forest. The wolves have since retreated into the mist once more. You emerge from the forest and look around.

    You find yourselves in a large valley. The mountains surrounding you mostly covered in thick forest. The sky is overcast, with storm clouds in the distance as you hear a faint roll of thunder. You can see the same mist you have encountered pervades everything around. You are in an open field, the path you've been following continues for several miles to a town that rises out iof the fog. High atop a cliff overlooking the town stands a large imposingcastle.

    Black void, overload, crest the solar filth
    Bringing fire from all quarters, release the dogs of Nebulon
    Array the host, the Nekro-Swarm, armored, gleaming humanoid
    The chittering mass fills our sensor screen-
    drive them back to the void
  • “The bard is right. We should head into the town. Maybe the townsfolk can tell us more about this fog’s source. Fighting it outright doesn’t seem to be the strategy.”

    Wil continues up the path towards the town.
  • OderusUrungusOderusUrungus BabyGroot
    edited November 2018
    You're a road kill baby
    I scraped you in my arms, ow!
    'Nother wattle flappin'
    On the old turkey farm
    So baby
    Baby, quit your crying
    Put them clown britches on

    While the wheels keep rolling
    And another milepost gone
    All along on the road behind
    Oh can't you hear me calling
    Just like the sad whale song
    I'm on that road behind
  • toddterps62toddterps62 RabbleRouser,
    This journey
    Without time
    Always the beginning
    Yet perpetual end
    Found we'd never left
    This time, a battle un-won
    In the center of it again
    This time, death is at our command
    Returned to our former glory
    The never-ending story
    Look what you fuckers made me do
  • MittensMittens RabbleRouser,
    Truer words have never been spoken.

    Onward towards the town!
  • SockSock RabbleRouser
    The party heads in the direction of the town, and as you near the outskirts you can see in the overcast dusklight tall shapes loom out of the dense fog that surrounds everything. The muddy ground underfoot gives way to slick, wet cobblestones. The tall shapes become recognizable as village dwellings. The windows of each house stare out from pools of blackness. No sound cuts the silence except for mournful sobbing that echoes through the streets from a distance.

  • SockSock RabbleRouser
    As you make your way into town, and the sun setting behind the mountains around you,
    a single shaft of light thrusts illumination into the main square, its brightness looking like a solid pillar in the heavy fog. Above the gaping doorway, a sign hangs precariously askew, proclaiming this to be the Blood on the Vine tavern.
  • “Boys I have the thirst of a thousand men. Wolves make me so parched. Let’s grab some mead.”

    Wil, swings open the door wide and steps into the tavern. He lets go of the door and it swings quickly shut behind him as you hear,

    “It is I, Wil the hum...”

    And the door slams shut.
  • B-B-B-Bullet belts and denim jackets
    Crystal meth in tiny packets
    Witches, warlocks, demon seed
    Booze and cooze and weed and speed
  • Prihani also could go for a drink so he enters the tavern too, assuming the door is large enough.
  • SockSock RabbleRouser
    Wil enters the tavern the rest of you following behind. As you enter the run down establishment you see a room several tables and chairs, aged and in need of repair, a large fireplace with a good sized fire burning. A short pudgy man behind the bar absentmindedly cleaning glasses. You pass a table of three women dressed in very colorful outfits talking quietly amongst themselves. Another two tables with one person at each.
  • Oderus points to the short pudgy man knowingly
    People throwing rocks at us, said
    We got a tour lined up
    We got a show
    I got a midget following me 'round everywhere I go now
    He says his name is Joe now
    I really just don't know now
  • SockSock RabbleRouser
    The man blinks, as if waking up. Noticing the strange makeup of the group entering the tavern.

    "I'm sorry what? Oh, can I get you something? "
  • I wanna suck like lovers do
    I wanna lose a Grammy too
    I wanna kick the teeth outta you
  • SockSock RabbleRouser
    "I don't think you'll find that 'round here fella"

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